3/07/2008

The Fear Card Never Goes Away:
The annals of bugfuckery are loaded to bursting with nutzoid, paranoiac statements from the last few years. Surely, one might think, trillions of dollars into a war (or wars, whatever) and 6 and a half years since 9/11, there might be a moment or two to take it down a notch. If, for instance, you're a woman and you've been fucking this guy for hours on end, a half-dozen orgasms, ranging from screaming, "Oh, shit" to a pleasant tickle, gone by, sheets and bed soaked to a spongy consistency, there comes a point where you say, "Okay, my pussy's sore and I don't want it to get callouses," you need to stop. Sure, the fucking might still work on some level, the guy's cock at that waxing and waning, fall and rise period of erection, but mostly, at this point, it's time to give it a rest so that you might be able to fuck again soon.

If you're the pro-war right, though, holy fuck, you're gonna keep the hard-on for blood payback throbbing. And that's just what Lou "Behold My Combover of Righteous Indignation" Dobbs did last night on CNN, kicking out the savage jams in reaction to various unrelated acts of violence reported by Wolf Blitzer on The Situation Room. Snarled Dobbs, "The idea that we can control the violence itself is probably wishful thinking. We are going to have to come to terms with the fact that this war on radical Islamist terrorism is going to require stronger stuff than we have expended so far."

Oh, but Dobbs wasn't gonna stop there. He had a jugular in his teeth and he wanted to rip the meat away until it was exposed and spurting: "There is no way in which we can conduct a 'war on terror' without recognizing that we're going to have to root out relentlessly and vigorously and with all our might the seeds that give life to that kind of madness. That means going after unrelentingly those who would do us harm and doing so in a concerted, emphatic and lasting way, so that we can live in peace, not only in this country, but in Israel, in the Middle East, around the world. There is no way in the world for anyone to assume safely that half-measures will be in any way effective in stemming this kind of violence." Then, dancing in the arterial spray, Dobbs got ready for his own hatefest, leaving Blitzer to clean up the mess.

You read that shit and you think, "Holy motherfuck, do these assholes really conflate every act of violence into one homogeneous package? Do they really see Palestinian attacks on Israel and car bombs in Mosul as one thing? That one group is just like the other?" If so, then they really think we're fighting "terror." It ain't just rhetoric. It's like saying you're gonna wrestle Bigfoot and you spend the rest of your life searching the redwood forest for that hairy fucker. You ain't gonna find it, and you're gonna waste your life and money chasing air.

But, of course, Dobbs is only taking signals from those on high. In his speech commemorating the fifth anniversary of the creation of the Department of Homeland Security (motto: "We're Not Quite as Nazi-ish as Our Name Sounds"), President Bush indulged his latent mental patient as he brought out some of his greatest hits from 6 years of massaging the nation's fear prostate, like "The events of September the 11th, 2001 demonstrated the threats of a new era. I say 'new' because we found that oceans which separate us from separate -- different continents no longer separate us from danger," which is, like, one of the Rude Pundit's favorite Bush administration mantras because every time Bush says it, the earth rumbles with the sounds of dead Native Americans spinning.

Bush continued, "We saw the cruelty of the terrorists and extremists, and we glimpsed the future they intend for us. In other words, there's some serious lessons on September the 11th that it's important for all Americans to remember." You know, George W. Bush talking about "lessons" is not unlike a vampire talking about cooking with garlic. But Bush wasn't gonna let us forget those lessons, those inconvenient truths, if you will: "At this moment, somewhere in the world, a terrorist is planning an attack on us. I know that's inconvenient thought for some, but it is the truth."

And then, eyes spinning in his head, pulling from random shit that he's said a thousand times before, the President went off the rails: "This war against these extremists and radicals who would do us harm is the great ideological struggle of our time. We're in a battle with evil men -- I call them evil because if you murder the innocent to achieve a political objective, you're evil. (Applause.) These folks have beliefs. They despise freedom. They despise the right for people to worship an Almighty the way he or she sees fit. They desire to subject millions to their brutal rule. Our enemies oppose every principle of humanity and decency that we hold dear. They kill innocent men and women all the time." You gotta love that applause there. Imagine it: an auditorium full of presumptive grownups clapping when another presumptive grownup says, more or less, "Mean people suck."

Is there a point here where, our pussies and anuses sore, rubbed raw, we can say, "Stop"? Maybe we can even say to them, perhaps, "Look, it worked for a long time now, but, really, we're just not that scared anymore. And you're smothering us with your need for us to stay scared."

The neocons want the population to behave as if they are living under a dictatorship, quaking in fear from the pronunciations of the Beloved Leader, because only in fear will a population continue to desire violence. The problem, of course, is that, unless they actually start arresting and beating people for opposing the Leader, unless they are willing to go that far and start instilling fear not just of outsiders but of the Leader, they just sound like hysterical children who refuse to get over being pushed down in the sandbox.